Explaining the value of intergenerational connections
The Little Boy and the Old Man
by Shel Silverstein
Said the little boy, “Sometimes I drop my spoon.”
Said the old man, “I do that too.”
The little boy whispered, “I wet my pants.”
“I do that too,” laughed the little old man.
Said the little boy, “I often cry.”
The old man nodded, “So do I.”
“But worst of all,” said the boy, “it seems
Grown-ups don’t pay attention to me.”
And he felt the warmth of a wrinkled old hand.
“I know what you mean,” said the little old man.
Whether we work in the continuing care sector or not, most of us find something profound about children connecting with seniors who live in care. The number of media stories which focus on intergenerational programming, unlikely intergenerational friendships, or school programs in care homes, are a testament that these stories trigger a deep emotional reaction for many of us.
But why does this strike such a chord?
Research tells us that intergenerational programming can improve quality of life. For seniors, intergenerational programs have been shown to have positive impacts on health, activity levels, self-esteem, feelings of productivity, pro-social behaviour, reduction in solitary behavior, reduced depression, better problem-solving skills and even better mobility. Programs have also been demonstrated to have positive effects for children.
While the research points to a long list of positive outcomes associated with intergenerational programming, there is likely something deeper at play in terms of why these stories make us happy-cry into our coffee cups.
Arguably, what inspires us when we hear about intergenerational programming can be reduced to two phenomena:
1) the ability of children and older-adults to relate to each other as two marginalized groups, and;
2) the ability of both children and older adults, especially people living with dementia, to relate to each other without an expectation of a shared reality.
As beautifully articulated by Shel Silverstein in the poem quoted above, despite being on the opposite ends of the age continuum, children and older adults who need care often share certain characteristics. They must often rely on others, they struggle with physical limitations, and they often they feel that their perspectives are not fully appreciated by others.
Of course, this is not to suggest that seniors and children are the same, but rather that they are in the unique position to appreciate each other’s experiences.
When it comes to older adults living with dementia, children and seniors often have a special bond. Perhaps this is because they are able to connect to each other without judgment, in a space where they are not required to share a reality.
For children, make-believe is an important part of growth and development, as well as a way to connect to a world which may not totally make sense yet. Likewise, seniors living with dementia may relate to their world in a changed way, which can be at odds with the reality of people who are not living with dementia. For both groups, “truth” can be fluid, making it much easier for the two groups to connect with each other, than others.
What does this mean for the seniors care sector?
As highlighted in discussions facilitated at the Creating Communities of Care forum in September, for example, intergenerational programming can be a way to improve the quality of life for seniors, both living in care homes and in the community.
Does your organization offer intergenerational programming? BCCPA would love to hear from you.
